Sunday, December 11, 2011
Since August I have felt like this senior year felt familiar. Almost like I've already experienced it in a weird deja vu kind of way. It wasn't until recently that is dawned on me as to why. Its odd how similar "first-firsts" and "last-lasts" are. I remember coming into college as a freshmen so incredibly high on life. Everything was unknown and new. I wanted to soak in every ounce of what I was experiencing. I formed friendships and poured every bit of myself into them. I carried my camera around everywhere because each moment was a memory I knew I would want to save. Now as a senior all these feelings and tendencies have resurfaced. I have found myself soaking in every ounce of what is here and now because it is all I know. In a few short months I'll be packing up and leaving what has been my entire life for the past four years. Knowing that the end is near, I am pouring every bit of myself into my friends because we'll never have another chance to be so close sharing life so intimately with each other. I've even been taking my camera everywhere - snapping as many pictures as I can because these are moments I'll never have again. I've come full circle. Just like the summer after high school when I was terrified to begin college, here I am, once again, terrified to leave. Thankfully the fear is accompanied by eagerness and excitement for what is to come. I'm so thankful that ever last is followed by a new first.